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tempurpedic bed project

Help Mice Sleep with Cher on a Memory Foam Mattress

Poor little mice. Sleeping on the cold concrete. Their backs aching. Doesn’t anybody even care?

You do. I know you do. Despite the fact that they eat garbage and carry hideous diseases like the plague of the Middle Ages and the clap of Chicago, mice are cute. Little girls love them. So do cats. So do you. Search your heart. You know it’s true.

Living off stale cheese and second hand McDonalds, mice have some of the most seriously warped spines around. Think: Boris Yeltzin after vodka-yoga. It doesn’t have to be that way… if somebody cared. Somebody like you. Mice deserve the scientific benefits of the Tempurpedic memory foam mattress, just as much as Cher.

You could play an important part in a little micey’s’ life. Forget the children in Africa. Every micey should sleep in the absolute comfort of dreams that only a memory foam mattress can bring. They deserve Tempurpedic, just as much as you deserve a roll in the hay with Cher while Boris Yeltzin films it and I do lights.

I know what you are thinking: “There are millions of mice in the world. How can I help to buy each little micey on this planet a memory foam mattress when I live off McDonald’s and smoke crack for a living?” Stop hitting the pipe and we’ll explain. Mice are small. You don’t have to buy each a memory foam bed from Tempurpedic. You just need the free samples. One free sample is practically an Olympic size bed for a little micey. Big enough furniture for a Jackie Treehorn orgiastic party of rodents.

Tempurpedic Warning!

Of course, the folks at Tempurpedic are on to this charitable memory foam effort. The bastards know that if they give samples of memory foam mattress away like so much cheese all the mice will live in comfort and luxury. The evil Tempurpedic people will go to great lengths to stop this.

But we have the power. We have the Internet. Even though you are one, together, we are many. Join forces. Get your free memory foam mattress sample and send it to me. I, in turn, will take steps to make sure that the right little micey gets it, likely. We have millions of little mice with damaged spines waiting for them as we speak. Many have insomnia, having spent their whole lives sleeping on cold concrete in horribly contorted positions. Some are even considering running for Congress. Do something. Order your memory foam mattress sample and make a little micey sleep well tonight. Save them from a life of crime and politics. Save them for your children, for your children’s future, for your children‘s future‘s children.

Get memory foam mattress sample NOW!!

Send away for your free Tempurpedic memory foam mattress sample. Together, we can change the way mice sleep. We can affect their sex lives for the better. Maybe they’ll even learn what it’s like to sleep with Cher. Fill out the foam form, or call 1-888-811-5052. Once you get your foam, ship it to OSJB- PO Box 49, Athens, OH 45701. Together we can change mice sex lives for the better and keep them from becoming politicians.

Tempurpedic Bed Project Pages:

  1. The Free Tempurpedic Bed Project
  2. Three Good Reasons to Donate your Tempur-Pedic® Foam
  3. The best Tempurpedic foam submissions so far
  4. Another Tempurpedic Page
  5. Memory foam mattress mice
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